Listen. Can you hear that? It's me....dancing on my kitchen table, shouting from the roof, and squealing with delight!!! woo hoo!!!! Today, April 21st, we were free!!! NO OXYGEN ALL DAY!!! All the exclamations are annoying and I'm celebrating prematurely, I know. I just can't help myself:). It is amazing!!!!
I've been trying to talk myself into the idea that the oxygen tank was not that big of a pain in the donkey deal. You know, it's just an accessory, or something like that. But, after experiencing daylight to dusk 'generator free'....I realize I was full of it. No background noise that sounds like an iron lung. No tangled cords. No tripping on tubes. No wraslin (this is the technical term) Ya to get the prongs back in her nose. She hung out on my bed while I showered and played with toys. We went outside! For the first time in 5 months, I was able to pick my baby up without thinking where is the tube, can I reach the kitchen, should we move the generator to another room?. I was able to care for both of my children's needs (as much as this is possible) because we were mobile. We were together all day because I could drag Lilah around with us....it was amazing!
The ironic divinely mysterious thing is--I had just given it up. Given up the my life will be better when she gets off that oxygen thoughts. Given up postponing life for the day when. I had quit dreaming of all that we could do if Lilah were oxygen free. I'm pretty sure it was more of a defeatist attitude than any sort of maturity, but a good lesson for me none the less. The Lord continues to teach us to turn everything over to Him and remind us that His ways are perfect.
In other (huge) news, we went somewhere as a family!!! All of us....to church on Sunday! It was really encouraging and not nearly as difficult (i.e. nerve racking) as I thought it would be. I am so glad to have RSV/flu season behind us:).
Clearly, I am on cloud 9 around here. Trying to give myself a pep talk about not riding the highs too high....it just gives you that much farther to fall the next time bad news comes around. But, oh the joy!