I don't have a great history with mice. Shocking...I know. In fourth grade, my parents set a mouse trap on the top shelf of our pantry. I stuck my hand in to get some Fun Fruits (why don't they still make those?) and it snapped--on my fingers!!! I ran around the house screaming/crying about the mouse trap stuck on my hand instead of removing it. Because I'm smart like that. Anyway, that was the beginning. I have never been the same.

Years later a friend told me that she is certain a mouse ran across her forehead while she was sleeping. I have not rested well since. And then there was the time Paul was out of town for 3 weeks (I'm not sure why the time is important, other than I knew I couldn't leave it until he got back. Also, he is not exactly rodent-slayer-extraordaire, fyi) and I had just gotten the kids down and settled in for my 612th viewing of The Notebook, when a mouse scurried under my feet (or across the room, which seemed like under my feet). After I quit crying and got down from the ceiling fan, I peeled the back off a sticky trap and set it up in the kitchen. I am not exaggerating (not that I would) when I say, minutes later, I heard the sound of struggle coming from said trap. THERE WAS A LIVE MOUSE STUCK ON MY TRAP, dragging itself across my kitchen, like a pirate with a wooden leg. (I'm feeling like I've already told this story, and if I have, too bad. It bears repeating). I will make a long, tear filled, many phone calls later to every man in my life story short by saying I bludgeoned the mouse to death with a broom handle. Bad way to go. But it beats having your children gnawed on by rats in their crib. (which actually has happened in this fine state, I should not joke).

All this brings me to today, which began by me walking down into my kitchen and straight onto a sticky trap WITH A DEAD MOUSE STUCK TO IT. That's right people. The layering order was this: house-shoe (praise the Lord I was not barefoot), mouse, sticky trap. I am also thankful that they were P's house-shoes and that they are easily replaceable. I hope you are having a better Monday than me (and the mouse). Oh, and I feel compelled to say that we don't live in a cardboard box, or with peanut-butter smearing the walls (which, did you know, mice love?)...just a lovely, older home.

Sweet Ya had a cardiology appointment today and it went well. Most everything her Dr. looks for was stable or improving....the best we could hope for. My brain still has a hard time processing the knowledge that her heart can be functioning well for a time and then...not. So, that part of these appointments are always a bit of a reality check. It's easy to have this sweet, happy, healthy looking (at least relative to last year) baby home and assume development or change will continue to happen in a positive manner.

But, the best thing about this appointment was......Lilah waved!!! Dr. Bremer came in the room, I said "can you wave and say hi to Dr Bremer?". At this point, you could see time slowing down as she worked to raise her hands and look at them quizzically. I have never seen time stand still, but it did, at least for us, as she looked at Dr. Bremer, looked back at her hand and squeezed her fingers in and out for.....A WAVE!!! It was....the most beautiful moment I've ever seen.

It's nice to see the miraculous in the otherwise ordinary!

Old Man Winter has heard my cry....and responded in fear and trembling! It is snowing a mighty snow now....a totally un-predicted snow, I think (but I wouldn't really know, bc I have turned my back on meteorologists everywhere). Anyway...snow, sweet snow! Woohoo!!

These pictures were taken this morning....during the wettest snow-play adventure of my life. I was having a bad attitude, but I did learn a few things:

1. kids (at least those 3 and under) don't know the difference

2. it's all great to them

3. and simultaneously terrible, as in "my gloves are wet!"

4. sleds go pretty fast when they are afloat

I had my own pair of ice skates growing up....because a couple of years the pond behind our house froze solid. It wasn't like living in the Northeast, but we got many good snowfalls a year. Lots of opportunity for sledding. Snowball fights. Snow shelters (which is what we called them after we realized building an actual igloo required more knowledge/skill/time than we had). Snowmen.

Now, I realize I have to make sacrifices for living south of the Mason-Dixon, and for the most part I love it. That's why Knoxville was voted the #1 place to retire. I made that up. For the benefit of my parents.:) But seriously, the weather is great and I could live with no-snow. I get to visit it in Indiana. What I can't live with is the 'promise of snow'. So, from this moment forward, I am never listening to another East TN weatherman, in his faux-Haiwian-print-shirt-under-a-suit and excessively bushy hair, EVER! (I have said this before, but I mean it now).

The recap of this week, if you don't live here, goes something like this: people start buzzing about snow on tues, on weds local retailers are advertising sleds, and by thurs the pharmacy is calling me "mrs. burch, please come and pick up Lilah's medicine because we don't want her to be without if we have to be closed for a few days." At this point, I start to take it a little seriously. Not getting excited, just making sure we have milk and meat (even though I'm pretty sure a family of 4 could live for a month on the contents of my pantry) and the appropriate medicines. Thurs night, I decide to turn on the news because, apparently they aren't going to interrupt the Backyardigans for a weather report, as I had been hoping. "6-12 inches." My ears perk up. I have been trained over the past years to know better ( I cannot count the number of snow-disappointments at this point). But I get sucked into the excitement.

Friday morning I learn schools have been called off. This must be something, I think. Even though I have yet to see a snowflake fall, I rush off to Target with both kids and everyone else in Knoxville for new boots and a sled. (I start therapy Monday). I count 3 snow pellets on my windshield on the way and start to dream of the possibilities. I talk it up to Garrett, who is already planning his sledding wardrobe. On the radio, they are giving snow cream recipes and advising people to stay off the roads. Everyone I know is talking about the blizzard of 2010. Even the biggest snow cynics are starting to get the fever. Plans for neighborhood snow parties are put in place. I hear groceries are out of bread, milk, and beans. I dig through cedar chests to find snow pants and waterproof gloves. This is it! How exciting!!!!

Just for the record the forcast was: 6-12 inches of snow, interspersed with ice (best sledding!), and rapidly dropping temps the next day. You know what we got? Maybe 1.5 inches of the sorriest snow I've ever seen. I knew it was a bad sign when the sound of rain woke me up this morning. Seriously!?! I thought we could count on at least a couple of good sleds down the hill (in a rubbermaid storage bin posing as a sled. clearly the best time to buy a sled is not in the south, on the day of an expected blizzard:), but, it's really hard to sled in the rain. I'm pretty sure I passed a goldfish on my way to get the paper from our mailbox.

I am sad. Mad. Very disappointed. And, I have to say, a bit disappointed in my own immaturity to get so worked up over a little (or practically no) snow. Garrett just said, "momma, has it quit raining so we can go outside in the snow?". I think there is a life lesson in here somewhere.

This is what we've been up to: breathing treatments, trips to doctors, sleepless nights, and coffee.

Both of my kids, apparently, have had RSV...this nasty respiratory virus that can have devastating effects on children under 2. Even though G did fine and is 'over it', L is having a much rougher time shaking it (no surprise there). Paul and I are running out of tricks to entertain/distract her as she sits through 6 breathing treatments a day.

I am so beyond thankful that Lilah has been receiving Synogis shots every month to help give her a better resistance to the virus (without that she would clearly be in the hospital). And so thankful for our insurance that pays a majority of $1500/shot, of which she gets 2 every month for 7 months.

I only write on this because it's been what's occupying our time, but it really is just a blip on the radar. My point is 'it's all relative' and compared to other experiences, RSV is not a big deal.

I am trying to look beyond our family and realizing that there is a lot of hardship that I wouldn't trade our stuff for anything. And then I watch the news about the crisis in Haiti and it quickly reminds me that my "healthy daughter didn't get lost in the rubble" "my family has food" "I dont' have to smell dead bodies piling up all around me"............and it reminds me....it is silly to wallow in sadness over our problems when we can barely comprehend the darkness surrounding others.

Remember that game at Showbiz Pizza where you smashed those pesky moles that popped their heads up at random with a giant mallet? It was my absolute favorite (after the dancing rat band and the prize tickets). I realize the name has changed to Chuck-E-Cheese, but since this makes me think of the pyscho doll and I might as well inject my children with a live virus, I'm not a big fan and prefer to remember the good-ole-days. Anyway, little did I know that game was so symbolic of life.... I feel like it's all about putting out the fires (and sometimes I just want to wack someone on the head).

The fires this week are double cases of croup, a single case of bronchitis, and a beloved pediatrician whose week-long sick leave is causing a serious case of anxiety in this mama. (I'm not joking, please pray Dr. Peeden is playing hooky and drinking scotch on some Caribbean island...or at least for a speedy recovery). I know the series of crises (is this a word? i'm trying to say the plural of 'crisis') is just part of parenting, but I'm longing for the day it feels more normal because right now it just feels like one crisis after another:)!!

But, lots of sweet with the sour. The kids are growing, and fighting, and laughing, and...happy. So much good in the midst of some really tough things, too. Our sermon this Sunday was one of the most true, real, relevant things I have heard in forever (or maybe it's just the only thing i've heard in forever)....about God's love for us and His intent for his people to trust Him. To take the bad with the good and know that He works all things for good. Not that there isn't a lot of suffering, but that the best is yet to come. And until then, hard times and easy times (what are these??) are not mutually exclusive....it's just life. We should try to enjoy the ride.

Some things I'm loving...

1. sweets. shoot me! i'm one of those 'all or nothing' kind of people when it comes to desserts, as in when a dessert (or dozens) break through the dam of my willpower--it's over! Me and my sweet tooth need to breakup....i'm just waiting for him to make the first move.

2. smartwool socks. i really hate wool....my skin is like a delicate flower (that has been dried out and roughed up, but that's another story) and i detest any 'itch', which is why i've stayed away from these long-talked about socks (at least in my family). but with temps in the teens, my resolved has caved and my toes are thanking me.

3. christmas gifts. i am so glad to have new books, new songs, and new pieces to pick up....a change of scenery is good. come where it may.:) plus, i scored some pretty sweet things myself and who doesn't like something new??

4. movies. i had a serious dry spell but i'm back on the wagon. run, run, run to see The Young Victoria and wish yourself a happy valentines day! if you don't have any favors in the bank and can't get your man to see that one, Invictus rocks too.

5. starbucks. i'm so 90s, i know....like this is something novel to like starbucks?! but really, it's so good and consistent and it amazes me. and, i can do it with kids in the car.

6. amazon.com. now there is very little need for me to leave the house, which is a good thing considering my children are clearly never going to quit getting sick!!! (it's croup this time. i'm bitter, can you tell?:)

7. snow! a weeks-worth of white stuff on the ground in k'town is unheard of...and beautiful. it arrived just in time because i'm usually all "it's so ugly!" this time of year. Also, seeing/hearing the drama surrounding less than 2 inches of possible snow fall in these parts cracks me up.

8. inventions. or ideas for inventions/money making schemes. i'm not sure why i'm obsessed, but i am. i think i have lots of good ideas (don't ask P his thoughts), i just don't know how to get them going. of course, i can't put my ideas up here on the www, because they might be stolen! just know, my mind is like a machine (where all the parts and pieces are spinning out of control and totally disorganized).

And some things I'm not liking so much (i'm working on being a kinder-gentler G in 2010, how's this sound?)

1. people dressing inappropriately for the weather. attn: if it's below 40, you need a coat and clothes toed shoes. also, if you are wearing layers/coat/hat...your children need the same.

2. a house i drive by everyday because it is time to take down the christmas tree on your front porch, and while you are at it, get rid of your 3 rotting pumpkins!!! seriously, it is cheering me down.

3. cold. i'm over it! where is the groundhog?

4. cashiers who comment on my purchases. it's none of their business what i'm doing with endive and no, i'm not having a party, we just eat a lot of ice cream.

5. snot. there is too much at this house and i'm ready for the dry-up.

6. dry hands. i have bought (what seems) like ever lotion on the market and my hands still look like i've run them through the paper shredder...dry, scratched, cracked, sad. p has put the big 'veto' down for me sleeping in gloves (apparently Diane Keaton does nothing for him?), so i'm open to suggestions. and yes, i wear gloves outside.